1. Children’s ideas about “changing sex” are usually about toys and stereotypes, not identity.
Many detransitioners recall that, as kids, they simply wanted to do things that were labeled “for the other sex.” One parent told a five-year-old girl who insisted she was a boy, “what being a boy meant. The little girl said she liked science, but one of her kindergarten classmates told her liking science was for boys, so she wanted to be a boy so she could like science… her doctor mother just had some explaining to do, that it's 100% awesome for girls to like science too, and her daughter happily dropped the subject” – quendergestion source [citation:4bdeee00-de5b-427c-97f7-84e99f79ffbe]. When adults took the time to ask why the child felt that way, the wish vanished once the stereotype was challenged.
2. Early affirmation can freeze normal, healthy exploration.
Detransitioners warn that telling a child “you really are the other sex” stops the natural process of trying on different roles. One woman explained, “There is no scientific evidence that classifies childhood fantasies about being the opposite sex as being particularly different from other common childhood fantasies… Most people either grow out of them or reframe them as they get older” – UniquelyDefined source [citation:e64f4616-74c8-4b43-b378-04315d67e315]. By labeling the feeling permanent, adults risk turning a passing phase into a medical path that is hard to leave.
3. Letting kids be themselves without changing their bodies is both kind and truthful.
Instead of medical steps, detransitioners recommend open dress-up, play, and honest talk. One parent wrote, “let your child dress and act how they wish. But maybe it’s best to explain to them the reality of their sex and make sure they understand they can be the most girly boy ever… it’s better to be healthy in the body you’re born into and present however you wish” – Dismal_Plant_8360 source [citation:185ee39e-91dd-4292-9de2-b29801e2c75f]. This approach keeps the door open for every kind of personality while protecting the child from irreversible decisions.
4. Many children simply outgrow the wish once they see role-models who break stereotypes.
Stories show that when kids meet women scientists, gentle boys, or any adult who lives outside the box, the urge to “become” the other sex fades. One mother noted, “you can wear cute stuff and be an effeminate man… Women can be a tomboy auto mechanic and still be female… There is no wrong way to be a boy or a girl” – sara7147 source [citation:578b210b-fd30-4300-8e0e-10a2cb337558]. Seeing real people thrive without changing their bodies teaches children that their own bodies are already good enough.
Conclusion
The accounts make it clear: most children who say they want to change sex are really asking for freedom from narrow roles, not for hormones or surgery. By challenging stereotypes, offering diverse role-models, and allowing full gender non-conformity, adults can protect kids from unnecessary medical paths and help them grow into comfortable, authentic adults in the bodies they were born with.